okay
I have a good Christian family, good neighboor hood, ect and most ppl think i'm living well off except for i'm not.
my dad used to be a drunk and went to jail for it, then he stopped and i just found out that he secretly started again, dad thinks mom is having affair but nobody knows for sure, parents r undecided about divorce and both ask me and my 6 year old sister if we want them to break up or not, we're broke and in HUGE debt and no money but parents spend ruthlessly, and it's AWFUL. we all try to cover it up from everybody but i always feel like my life is a big fat LIE which it kind of is. I really need something in my life thatll help me forget my problems like u know in books and movies how ppl sneak out of their houses and go make out with guys (ya i know i'm only 14) or a boyfriend or idk just something exciting that will make me actually look forward to life unlike how i get up every morning and wish i were dead. i kno, im desperate %26amp; its sad i hafta go online for thisI'm 14 years old and I need something EXCITING/UPLIFTING in my life and i need advice (Details below-PLZ read)
Wow. You're in a crappy situation, through no fault of your own, and unfortunately there's not much you can do right now to change that. However, maybe you should explore your talents and interests and focus on what you can do to start building your future now. Don't look to others to turn your attitude around for you, or you could end up just leaving yourself open for some guy to totally use you. Instead, try to list the things you are interested in, like, I dunno, maybe acting, or singing, or sports of some sort, and get involved in that. It will help take your mind off of the home situation for a while, and will give you a new sense of purpose and direction. Good luck! ;)I'm 14 years old and I need something EXCITING/UPLIFTING in my life and i need advice (Details below-PLZ read)
my advice is to join a club (church, book,etc.) then you have something to look forward to at least 1 day a week i mean it sux but i mean it kinda depends on the person u are are you outgoing, quiet, smart??????? im mean i like i said clubs help me or sports or just go somewhere like every weekend thats not to expensive with your friends. i hope that helps
This is very common in families with alcoholism; they expect the kids and the people that are not drunk to cover for them, and everybody feels they have to. But this is NOT healthy. It only allows things to get worse.
You can't control what your parents do and it's not your fault. You should probably start going to Alateen meetings to learn from other young people in similar situations. Talk to your school counselor about what is happening and they can probably tell you where to go to meetings too. This is just the sort of thing that school counselors are there for.
Since you are a Christian, I'd also recommend you make an appointment to talk to your pastor about it, of find somebody in your church community that you can talk to. Churches often have Alateen meetings on the premises.
I wish you well.
I really wish I could help you, but I'm no psychologist or anything.
Be optimistic. Life is worth living. Obstacles make life beautiful.
To answer your question; a movie called Thirteen.
It's actually a very nice movie.
Don't let other peoples problems bring you down.
I'd recommend either trying to explore your artistic side (a great release), or take up Aikido,
My dad also drinks a lot and my mom keeps threatening him with divorce, I can't do much about it, atleast I got the army to look forward to, and maybe even straighten some new people out :D!
Well, since I care about people....and if we were able to get to know each other ....I could send you a ';Thinking of You'; Card!!!!! Through the mail.
I'm sorry that your family is in such turmoil and you're feeling like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Add being a teenager to the mix, and things aren't much easier. A lot of families try to mask their lives from people on the outside.
Do you have someone you can talk to at school (a teacher, guidence counselor, etc) who you feel like you can confide in? Sometimes talking to someone can help you feel a lot better.
Also, looking for a boyfriend isn't a bad thing. I started dating around 14-- never anything serious, but it's nice to have a special someone in your life who really cares about you and will allow you to cry on their shoulder... and most importantly, that you can have fun with. People assume these days that having a boyfriend automatically means sex, but I truly believe that you can have a meaningful relationship (even at 14) without going all the way. I'm proof of that. My boyfriend at 14 and I just had fun together, without mixing in too much physicality (except for kissing, of course... lol).
Try making some fun plans for yourself and some friends. On the weekend go to the movies, go hiking, shopping, play mini-golf, go bowling, stuff like that. All those things are fun and can definitely give you something to look forward to.
Lastly, have you considering joining up with any school activities? I would highly recommend joining a sport (cheerleading, swim team, track, basketball, soccer, etc), even if you're not great at it-- cos you'll get better-- because it'll allow you to get out any aggression or bad feelings, and will leave you feeling satisfied. It'll also keep you busy and away from home with all the games and practices, which will help you keep your mind off the problems that you shouldn't have to deal with in the first place. If sports aren't for you, try out for your school play/musical, or join a club. Any of these things will take up your time, give you something to look forward to, and will help you to make new friends :)
Good luck, sweetheart. Don't feel bad about asking about this online. Sometimes it's the best place to get advice; we don't know you here so no one will judge you (at least they shouldn't!).
Every morning when you wake up, look in the mirror and say, in 4 years I'm outta here and I will not live my life this way.
PS. Making out with boys is only exciting while it lasts, then you feel dumb after, at least I would.
Good Christian family, check again alcoholism and adultery are those things standard in a good christian family? Anyhow it is not sad that you have to go on line for help because there are a lot of people with a lot of life experience that are on line. You are still young and you want to die eh, well it is more likely you are tired of your life as it is and it is time for a change. Set a goal or two for example take up running, it gets you out of the house and gives you exercise and time to think. Try martial arts good for discipline and health and will give you self confidence and the ability to empower yourself. Hey you may meet some new people at a martial arts class. Forgetting your problems does not make them go away confront them ask you father if he needs help such as Alcoholics Anonymous also confront your mother and ask her if she having an affair. I realize that you are young with a plate full of issues but do not worry your life is ahead and like I said set some goals no matter how big or small. Work towards them and appreciate yourself for who you are and what you have to offer.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
I find it very difficult to forget this girl and move on with my life.Can anyone give me some advice?
Even thought she left me and replaced me with another man I still can't forget about her and I still have feelings for her. What do I have to do to get rid of this feeling? Please help.I find it very difficult to forget this girl and move on with my life.Can anyone give me some advice?
Guy I am in the exact same boat. My ex left me for someone and was engaged to him only 2 weeks after our break up. Honestly, I still love her too. So I know what you are going through. Unfortunately, all the advice out there is going to be very cliche....time heals all, get out and meet other people, do something you enjoy doing, hang out with friends, etc...I don't know if any of that will help you but time is really the only thing that is helping me. You just have to realize that you have to stop for a second, accept that you love her, recognize her wrong, forgive her, forgive yourself, go through the grieving process and then you can move on. It's the only healthy way to get through this. There is nothing wrong with loving her and still having feelings for her. And unfortunately, its not a feeling you will ever be able to get rid of and you shouldn't want to. Love is love. Her not reciprocating doesn't mean you will love her any less because it sure didn't work for me. Matter of fact the more I tried to get rid of it, the more I realize the reason I was doing that was because I loved her. It just takes time man. It's a day by day process and we all have to go through it. Trust me, it will get better.I find it very difficult to forget this girl and move on with my life.Can anyone give me some advice?
All come on dude. You got along without her before you met her. Now you are going to get a long now. Take it as a learning experience. Be glad she is gone.
Guy I am in the exact same boat. My ex left me for someone and was engaged to him only 2 weeks after our break up. Honestly, I still love her too. So I know what you are going through. Unfortunately, all the advice out there is going to be very cliche....time heals all, get out and meet other people, do something you enjoy doing, hang out with friends, etc...I don't know if any of that will help you but time is really the only thing that is helping me. You just have to realize that you have to stop for a second, accept that you love her, recognize her wrong, forgive her, forgive yourself, go through the grieving process and then you can move on. It's the only healthy way to get through this. There is nothing wrong with loving her and still having feelings for her. And unfortunately, its not a feeling you will ever be able to get rid of and you shouldn't want to. Love is love. Her not reciprocating doesn't mean you will love her any less because it sure didn't work for me. Matter of fact the more I tried to get rid of it, the more I realize the reason I was doing that was because I loved her. It just takes time man. It's a day by day process and we all have to go through it. Trust me, it will get better.I find it very difficult to forget this girl and move on with my life.Can anyone give me some advice?
All come on dude. You got along without her before you met her. Now you are going to get a long now. Take it as a learning experience. Be glad she is gone.
Desperate to find answers on how i feel my choice now will change my life completely need any advice?
Well i we are both 23 so quite young i know. Been together for almost 4 years now. Living together for 3 of those years and engaged for 1. READ BOTTOM AT PARAGRAPH LEAST
I like to dance wildly, play games,like to suprise people, and do the unexpected which becomes expected after a while. In a strange way i believe 1st impression of me from a stranger is gay, I AM NOT GAY very feminally based i'd agree but not gay. Which a few adventrous ladies have found out. Iam not to fond of drink myself but i do like wine and shots. and typical so classed girlie drinks.
On its head my fiancee is tipacally a bloke loves, beer loves football, loves a good action or horror movie. And loves nothing more than to cuddle up and sleep.
I have been the last few months doubting how i feel. i find myself unhappy when shes around me 50% of the time and find that im not physically turned on. that may just be stress.
She has moved out temporarily so i can find out how i feel.
What the hell should i doDesperate to find answers on how i feel my choice now will change my life completely need any advice?
opposites usually attract, particularly in such cases. in your case, it seems to be fizzling out. move on. but chances r the next girl would be the same.Desperate to find answers on how i feel my choice now will change my life completely need any advice?
Sound like you have out gown each other, you are both very different people to who you were when you met, you are different at 19 than at 23.
Maybe a break from each other will do ye good. Sounds like you have fallen out of love with her. I know 4 years is along time but maybe this just isnt ment to be. Be true to yourself. If you love her follow after her but if you dont then just let her go..
well doubting isnt a good sign, sounds like you need a more girly woman youll have more in common with
You have doubts then the time apart will help.You will either
miss her like mad or realise that the love has gone.Good Luck
Well, temporary separation will be the best moved, so will be able to analyze things between you.
Actually, you are the only person who could answer your question.
Try to examine yourself. Go with other girls you like and see if you will fantasize them.
I know other guys, who used to be a man and have baby with their girlfrirends and later on.... realizes that they are ....gay. I am not kidding. I am serious.
The kind of work that you are having and the kind of people you meet everyday...your environment ....believe me... it is contagious.
Never be afraid to accept the truth. That's the real you.
same reply as brandb
You say you're not gay, and that's fine. You don't say how you feel now that's she's moved out....relieved? Happy? Do you miss her?
Give yourself some time to sort out how you feel but ultimately, it sounds to me like you're just with the wrong girl.
I think you need to find yourself someone who you have a little more in common with and is a little more feminine.
Opposites might attract, but you need to have some sort of common ground...
well if you're doubting things now without the pressure of marriage on your shoulders - its not looking too optimistic!
you're still very young - could you not just talk to her and discuss the possibility of making this a long engagement and try to sort out how you feel then - her moving out is a good thing - at least when you're away from her you have space to clear your head.xx
Get out there and start experiencing life. Don't just settle for someone that does not make you happy. There are plenty of other girls out there.
I like to dance wildly, play games,like to suprise people, and do the unexpected which becomes expected after a while. In a strange way i believe 1st impression of me from a stranger is gay, I AM NOT GAY very feminally based i'd agree but not gay. Which a few adventrous ladies have found out. Iam not to fond of drink myself but i do like wine and shots. and typical so classed girlie drinks.
On its head my fiancee is tipacally a bloke loves, beer loves football, loves a good action or horror movie. And loves nothing more than to cuddle up and sleep.
I have been the last few months doubting how i feel. i find myself unhappy when shes around me 50% of the time and find that im not physically turned on. that may just be stress.
She has moved out temporarily so i can find out how i feel.
What the hell should i doDesperate to find answers on how i feel my choice now will change my life completely need any advice?
opposites usually attract, particularly in such cases. in your case, it seems to be fizzling out. move on. but chances r the next girl would be the same.Desperate to find answers on how i feel my choice now will change my life completely need any advice?
Sound like you have out gown each other, you are both very different people to who you were when you met, you are different at 19 than at 23.
Maybe a break from each other will do ye good. Sounds like you have fallen out of love with her. I know 4 years is along time but maybe this just isnt ment to be. Be true to yourself. If you love her follow after her but if you dont then just let her go..
well doubting isnt a good sign, sounds like you need a more girly woman youll have more in common with
You have doubts then the time apart will help.You will either
miss her like mad or realise that the love has gone.Good Luck
Well, temporary separation will be the best moved, so will be able to analyze things between you.
Actually, you are the only person who could answer your question.
Try to examine yourself. Go with other girls you like and see if you will fantasize them.
I know other guys, who used to be a man and have baby with their girlfrirends and later on.... realizes that they are ....gay. I am not kidding. I am serious.
The kind of work that you are having and the kind of people you meet everyday...your environment ....believe me... it is contagious.
Never be afraid to accept the truth. That's the real you.
same reply as brandb
You say you're not gay, and that's fine. You don't say how you feel now that's she's moved out....relieved? Happy? Do you miss her?
Give yourself some time to sort out how you feel but ultimately, it sounds to me like you're just with the wrong girl.
I think you need to find yourself someone who you have a little more in common with and is a little more feminine.
Opposites might attract, but you need to have some sort of common ground...
well if you're doubting things now without the pressure of marriage on your shoulders - its not looking too optimistic!
you're still very young - could you not just talk to her and discuss the possibility of making this a long engagement and try to sort out how you feel then - her moving out is a good thing - at least when you're away from her you have space to clear your head.xx
Get out there and start experiencing life. Don't just settle for someone that does not make you happy. There are plenty of other girls out there.
Life not going well, need advice and/or help.?
A lot of things have not been going right lately in my life, and i'm talking personally, relationships, at work, financially and school. Everywhere i turn life seems to throw me another curve ball, and everyday when i get home i just want to lay in my bed and forget about all the problems in my life and dream of what it would be like to be someone else with no problems, not talking to anyone. Any advice would help, or is it im just depressed?Life not going well, need advice and/or help.?
Your stress could be leading you on the path towards depression. What you need to do is resist the urge to lay in bed and avoid everything. Find some activities that fill your spirit, whether it be art, music, dancing, writing, working out, volunteering...or anything else you can think of that is a meaningful activity to you. Don't succumb to the depression by lying in bed. Life is throwing you a lot of curve balls and once you get through this, you will be stronger than before.Life not going well, need advice and/or help.?
Ale961 - The outside world is a mirror of what is going on inside of you. According to Rhonda Byrne in her book ';The Secret'; we all attract to ourselves whatever we think about the most.
In order to change the situations/conditions of your life, you need to change your thoughts.
Please read ';The Secret'; or watch ';The Secret'; DVD.
it is a test of life we go thru.... you got to be strong ....everyone has problems people in hospital with cancer going thru key- mo .some just found out they got aids some just found out a death in the family some just found out so and so going to jail.. some one just lost a house ..some one just died .....some one just lost a job ....things get real next to you at times just pray to over come ....relashionships is of your choice you chose to be with this person if they mean you no good then time to say see ya .... inless you can get a good understanding do not do good then time to cut it lose ......$$$$$$$$$ money at school can always be fix'd in time little by little.life throug's cover balls look at JOB in the bible he over come so can you some time when we are on bottom it is time to call on the creator for help and strength.. you must never give up ..get to your self search things out get a pice of paper and write down the things bothering you ........ then how can you fix that problem mate wise ---$$$$$$$ wise------ things work out you got to give it time ........ prayer %26amp; streangth
It sounds like life is coming at you faster than you seem to be able to handle it. When I'm feeling particularly down, I usually go outside for a while. I like to go to the gym and leave my day there, or go for a bike ride outside. Exercise is one of the best ways to make you feel better (something about endorphines and the like).
Try picking up a new hobby, something inexpensive that you enjoy doing (running, people watching, swimming, etc). It may help. It may also help for you to go out with your friends after work, or go camping on a weekend. If you continue to feel this way for an extended period of time (I'm talking over a month) then you might want to seek professional help.
best of luck.
get the movie or book The Secret and it will tell you how to change your life!
Sounds like you're at a crossroads.
You might be a little depressed with your situation.
Sit down and think about what you want out of life. If you are not satisfied with your situation, maybe you should make some changes.
You are the one in control of your life. Life is too short to be unhappy.
Figure out what will make you happy, and go for it!
Good luck!
Go to your doctor and ask if he can give you something. And, in the past year I have discovered Church and prayer gives me peace. Go ahead thumbs down folks...come and get me.
well you can try to listen to music, read a book watch t.v. or movie to forget about it all , also one thing that seems to work for me and most people is praying to the lord when things go wrong and even though you may think you are in this alone believe me when i say your not the lord is always by your side just waiting for you to call out to him to help you!
You are depressed and after reading your story, I would say clinically depressed. What I would do is seek advice from your local mental health organization. Depression if not treated can become a much bigger problem.
To me, it doesn't sound like you have true clinical depression. I think you're just under stress from so much that's going on in your life that you feel weighed down by the pressure. But rest assured, we all have problems too, so wishing you were someone else is a futile exercise. Laying in bed and trying to forget your problems by wishing them away won't help. You can't escape them, they always are there when you wake up. So, it's better to deal with them and try to remove as much stress in your life as possible. Go to the library and get some books on how to deal with stress. You might even check into self-hypnosis, they have plenty of books and tapes on that. It will teach you how to relax and will condition you to not over-stress when another problem comes your way. If those don't help and you can't cope, see a therapist or life coach who can teach you coping skills. Good luck to you!
There is no such thing as someone with no problems. Everyone has them it's just a matter of how you deal with them. Sometimes life is really hard and you feel like it would be better to just be done with it but just remember that what doesn't kill you will make you stronger. God throws us these curve balls so that we can catch them and make the best play. You cannot learn if you don't have any experiences to learn from. Take what God has given you and hold your head up. You will get through it although it may be tough and you will be a better person. Good Luck!
wow-- ur life reminds me of the movie ';the pursuite of happiness';cheap make up
Your stress could be leading you on the path towards depression. What you need to do is resist the urge to lay in bed and avoid everything. Find some activities that fill your spirit, whether it be art, music, dancing, writing, working out, volunteering...or anything else you can think of that is a meaningful activity to you. Don't succumb to the depression by lying in bed. Life is throwing you a lot of curve balls and once you get through this, you will be stronger than before.Life not going well, need advice and/or help.?
Ale961 - The outside world is a mirror of what is going on inside of you. According to Rhonda Byrne in her book ';The Secret'; we all attract to ourselves whatever we think about the most.
In order to change the situations/conditions of your life, you need to change your thoughts.
Please read ';The Secret'; or watch ';The Secret'; DVD.
it is a test of life we go thru.... you got to be strong ....everyone has problems people in hospital with cancer going thru key- mo .some just found out they got aids some just found out a death in the family some just found out so and so going to jail.. some one just lost a house ..some one just died .....some one just lost a job ....things get real next to you at times just pray to over come ....relashionships is of your choice you chose to be with this person if they mean you no good then time to say see ya .... inless you can get a good understanding do not do good then time to cut it lose ......$$$$$$$$$ money at school can always be fix'd in time little by little.life throug's cover balls look at JOB in the bible he over come so can you some time when we are on bottom it is time to call on the creator for help and strength.. you must never give up ..get to your self search things out get a pice of paper and write down the things bothering you ........ then how can you fix that problem mate wise ---$$$$$$$ wise------ things work out you got to give it time ........ prayer %26amp; streangth
It sounds like life is coming at you faster than you seem to be able to handle it. When I'm feeling particularly down, I usually go outside for a while. I like to go to the gym and leave my day there, or go for a bike ride outside. Exercise is one of the best ways to make you feel better (something about endorphines and the like).
Try picking up a new hobby, something inexpensive that you enjoy doing (running, people watching, swimming, etc). It may help. It may also help for you to go out with your friends after work, or go camping on a weekend. If you continue to feel this way for an extended period of time (I'm talking over a month) then you might want to seek professional help.
best of luck.
get the movie or book The Secret and it will tell you how to change your life!
Sounds like you're at a crossroads.
You might be a little depressed with your situation.
Sit down and think about what you want out of life. If you are not satisfied with your situation, maybe you should make some changes.
You are the one in control of your life. Life is too short to be unhappy.
Figure out what will make you happy, and go for it!
Good luck!
Go to your doctor and ask if he can give you something. And, in the past year I have discovered Church and prayer gives me peace. Go ahead thumbs down folks...come and get me.
well you can try to listen to music, read a book watch t.v. or movie to forget about it all , also one thing that seems to work for me and most people is praying to the lord when things go wrong and even though you may think you are in this alone believe me when i say your not the lord is always by your side just waiting for you to call out to him to help you!
You are depressed and after reading your story, I would say clinically depressed. What I would do is seek advice from your local mental health organization. Depression if not treated can become a much bigger problem.
To me, it doesn't sound like you have true clinical depression. I think you're just under stress from so much that's going on in your life that you feel weighed down by the pressure. But rest assured, we all have problems too, so wishing you were someone else is a futile exercise. Laying in bed and trying to forget your problems by wishing them away won't help. You can't escape them, they always are there when you wake up. So, it's better to deal with them and try to remove as much stress in your life as possible. Go to the library and get some books on how to deal with stress. You might even check into self-hypnosis, they have plenty of books and tapes on that. It will teach you how to relax and will condition you to not over-stress when another problem comes your way. If those don't help and you can't cope, see a therapist or life coach who can teach you coping skills. Good luck to you!
There is no such thing as someone with no problems. Everyone has them it's just a matter of how you deal with them. Sometimes life is really hard and you feel like it would be better to just be done with it but just remember that what doesn't kill you will make you stronger. God throws us these curve balls so that we can catch them and make the best play. You cannot learn if you don't have any experiences to learn from. Take what God has given you and hold your head up. You will get through it although it may be tough and you will be a better person. Good Luck!
wow-- ur life reminds me of the movie ';the pursuite of happiness';
I'm suffering from severe depression, and need a girlfriend really bad...My life is falling apart. ADVICE?
I'm 19 years old, and I am a full-time college student at a community college. I did really bad this semester and had to already withdrawl 2 of my classes, and i'm not sure if I'm gonna pass another class. I deffinetly passed 1 of my classes. I really want a girlfriend, and I have been really depressed about it all semester. I tried to make new friend during the semester, but didn't have any luck. I really want a girlfriend, and I keep getting rejected. It's impossible to live without a girlfriend, and I've became suicidal about being single. I've been reject too many times to remember. I hate living without a girlfriend, and I cry in pain about being single.
I know that next semester I will have to try harder to pass all my classes. But it's hard, not to get upset about not having a girlfriend . I don't understand it; how some all guy college students have girlfriends but i don't. I have biceps, and I am always clean, and I have a calm and quiet personality.I'm suffering from severe depression, and need a girlfriend really bad...My life is falling apart. ADVICE?
I agree, you're not thinking clearly although you might think you are. Seek medical help, the campus should be able to connect you to who you should be talking too. Dream big and don't ever give up!I'm suffering from severe depression, and need a girlfriend really bad...My life is falling apart. ADVICE?
who cares about your outer looks as it is your heart that you should care about. All the muscles and biceps in the world is not going to cure depression. Stop worrying about girlfriends and everything else that causes the depression. Focus on things that are positive and possibly happy for you and he rest will work out. remember, no girl wants a guy that is depressed, weak or looks like he is sick, even with biceps
You must make sure this is the real reason of your depression, because if not, you will also make the girl depressed.
Maybe it is because you are depressed people wont go out with you. It seems to me that you are way too desperate and are asking out people you dont even fancy!
another reason for you not having a girlfriend may be because you have asked too many people out, so they will think that as soon as you get bored you will move on.
x
I dont know your religious belief. however I would like to tell you that if you pray and put your faith in God he will help. It juat may not be the right time for you to have a girlfriend right now, you should focus on what you have right now.. which seems to be a great opportunity as some of us do not have the luxury of college right now. work on you before you worry/stress/get depressed in not having someone.
You don't need a girlfriend to be happy. It helps but the problem is coming from within. It would be wise to straiten out your life first before getting into a relationship. I know you say you're hurting because you're single but it may go deeper than that. You should get help because the best relationships are when both people are complete and whole as a person.
And looks aren't always important. Good Luck. I hope this helps/
I think you'll have more luck finding a girlfriend once you feel good about yourself. Put all your effort into sorting out your classes. Once you start to do well you will become more confident in yourself and be a happier, more attractive person. Desperation, neediness and under achievement will not attract girls. We want a confident person who knows who they are, what they're aiming for and are are happy with or without a female on their arm. Find yourself first, be happy with who you are. Good luck X
You need to see a psychologist so you can figure out why it is that you find personal value through another human being? You should be happy with yourself girlfriend or no girlfriend. I know it must be hard with no friends, though, but see a psychologist. There is probably nothing wrong with you at all except your self-image.
Women can smell desperation.
Nobody wants to be with a needy person.
Take some time to gain confidence in yourself and loosen up.
Becoming suicidal just because you don't have a girlfriend is mighty silly at 19 years old, or any age.
You need to spend some time maturing before getting into a relationship..
Hi. I;m sorry but that sounds crazy.
Having a girlfriend wont solve all your problems, I think itll make them worse. There are lots of ups and downs in relationships and by commiting to noe, you are adding more problems to your other ones. My advice would be to get your school life in order and confidence up, than things will fall into place.. Good Luck
well it sound like to me that your happiness depends on if you have a girlfriend or not. you're 19 that's young you have plenty of time for women just focus on things you like to do and you'll meet someone. just just don't rely on another person to make you happy...............make yourself happy. good luck!
dude its nothing wrong being single. I would suggest forcus on passing and get your own life in gear first before you bring someone into your life. Then talk to girls at school heck try the internet. theres plenty of women and your only 19 come on! Take your time and enjoy your single life go out to the clubs. You will get your girl if you take control of your life first. peace.
Why is having a GF SO important to you?
You should have a full and happy life without a lady.
You are searching desperately for someone else to make you happy and that is not going to work.
You sound like you may need some counseling to get over this.
Good Luck to you.
You are still young. You have your whole life ahead of you to find someone. Finding people isnt always that great either cause sometimes they get in the way and end up lying, hurting, and taking advantage, but I know you will find someone. Theres someone out there for everybody.
Having a girlfriend something that will not fix your Depression , But talking to someone about it your Depression. You'er never alone if you know whom you are within yourself , and able to find friends whom care about you.
I think your depression is clouding your judgment. It's not a girlfriend you need, dear, it's counseling. See if your community college has free psychologists and go visit one. You need professional help, not the ramblings of people on here.
You are right people do need companionship but you have to love you first. A girlfrend can't fix your depression, you have to work on you first and that may involve more time with you. Learn to love who you are because if you loved yourself suicide would not be an option. find yourself.
You don't need a girlfriend. There are plenty of single people that are happy and not suicidal. You need to focus on school. You may also need to speak with a counselor to see why you are really depressed. Hope everything gets better.
I understand the feeling of being lonely and wanting a girl, but in all honesty..the problem lies in you. You need to be happy with yourself and your own life before you let anyone new in...
Maybe you are trying too hard. You should take some time off and relax. You say that girls are rejecting you, so what? Relax man, they don't know what they're missing.
Thats a little pathetic. You have some issues to deal with before you even think about getting yourself a girl, or before one considers dating you.
Girls wont date someone who is depressed unless they are also depressed. You are not going to get a girlfriend when you feel this way.
suffering from girlmania?
I am here!! You sound like a really nice guy I dont know why you dont have a girlfriend. Lucky me!!
try for bbw chick they are pretty cool and they love you to death
Aww :(
She's out their somewhere hunny.
You've just got to find her.
Listen don't get depressed over it, Concentrate on passing your classes.
If you have any guy mates why dont you go out to a club for the night and you may find a girl there. Just pluck up the courage and just say Hello, How are you. To a girl that you'd like to become friends with She won't bite :P
Your only 19. The girl of your dreams will come along soon. Can't you get a part time job or a saturday job? Maybe you'd meet a girl worker there...
Or you could just randomly meet a girl.
Don't stress about it you sound like a really nice guy (: If i met you i'd go out with you :P But sadly your to old for me. Lol.
I hope you find her soon Hun. Just please dont get upset over it ):
Good luck x
A girlfriend won't fix whatever you feel is missing in your life. I'm guessing that you've pinned all your fears and hopes and worries and stresses on this one thing and expect it to make your life worthwhile -- but what person would want to take on that kind of a burden, the responsibility of fixing you and shouldering all your problems? A relationship should be a partnership, where you share good times and bad, not where one person unloads all their expectations on the other. I suspect the women you eye sense this about you and don't want to become your caretaker.
I would strongly suggest getting into counselling -- colleges often have counsellors available -- and working on getting yourself a bit more in balance and happy with yourself first. You tend to stumble over love much more easily and successfully when you're not out searching desperately for it and pinning all your expectations on the other person.
First of all you don't NEED a girlfriend you want one, second of all a girlfriend isn't going to pay your college loans if you flunk out so you may want to re-prioritize a bit. You may want to talk to a college counselor about this desire to HAVE to have a girlfriend. Suicidal is a bit rash and you need some help, more then yahoo answers is going to give you, you need to be complete with yourself before you can get a girlfriend, by the sound of your state of mind, and irrational behavior that could very well be why you don't have a girlfriend and why if you get one you wont' keep her, women like strong men, work on it.
aww don't feel sad! I might be younger than you but I know exactly how you feel. I think it was in 2006 that I started to feel very sad because I didn't have a boyfriend and every girl around my age was talking about how they had a boyfriend and all, and I was really sad and hurt. But I focused on the other good things about my life. YES I still do want a boyfriend but I know that if I wait a little bit longer, the right one will come along. So just hang in there ok? You will have a girfriend just wait. do not kill yourself JUST WAIT
You need to have something to offer a girlfriend besides a drepressed and susidal personality! You need to get YOURSELF TOGETHER, BEFORE you try and get a girlfriend! It is because you feel you can't live alone and are drepressed that you don't have a girlfriend! Girls can pick up on you being so desparate to have a girlfriend and how you are feeling about yourself and your life! Untill you can learn to love you and love being with yourself, and have your life together and be confident, you won't have a girlfriend unless you are lucky enough to find one as depressed and confused as you and that you don't need! It's time to grow up now, being able to accept living alone is all a part of growing up, some have an easier time than others! A girl wants a confident man to go out with not a sniveling insecure little boy! Work on getting yourself together and your dating life should improve!
It is not impossible to live without a girlfriend/boyfriend. I did it for 20 years, and just to let you know, I am 20 years old. I have also been rejected plenty of times, and I have to admit, I know where you are coming from. All my friends have been in long term relationships, and my two closest friends are actually a couple and I used to do everything with them. But recently I have been hanging out with more people like me, people who are single. It helps me forget about wanting someone. That person is out there for you, and you will find them when the time is right. Right now, school is the most important thing in your life, and that is what you need to concentrate on.
Maybe if you stop being a little girl about everything then they will take a liking to you. Remember just because they say no doesn't mean you need to take a day out of your life to cry about it. Your a man, act like one.
I know that next semester I will have to try harder to pass all my classes. But it's hard, not to get upset about not having a girlfriend . I don't understand it; how some all guy college students have girlfriends but i don't. I have biceps, and I am always clean, and I have a calm and quiet personality.I'm suffering from severe depression, and need a girlfriend really bad...My life is falling apart. ADVICE?
I agree, you're not thinking clearly although you might think you are. Seek medical help, the campus should be able to connect you to who you should be talking too. Dream big and don't ever give up!I'm suffering from severe depression, and need a girlfriend really bad...My life is falling apart. ADVICE?
who cares about your outer looks as it is your heart that you should care about. All the muscles and biceps in the world is not going to cure depression. Stop worrying about girlfriends and everything else that causes the depression. Focus on things that are positive and possibly happy for you and he rest will work out. remember, no girl wants a guy that is depressed, weak or looks like he is sick, even with biceps
You must make sure this is the real reason of your depression, because if not, you will also make the girl depressed.
Maybe it is because you are depressed people wont go out with you. It seems to me that you are way too desperate and are asking out people you dont even fancy!
another reason for you not having a girlfriend may be because you have asked too many people out, so they will think that as soon as you get bored you will move on.
x
I dont know your religious belief. however I would like to tell you that if you pray and put your faith in God he will help. It juat may not be the right time for you to have a girlfriend right now, you should focus on what you have right now.. which seems to be a great opportunity as some of us do not have the luxury of college right now. work on you before you worry/stress/get depressed in not having someone.
You don't need a girlfriend to be happy. It helps but the problem is coming from within. It would be wise to straiten out your life first before getting into a relationship. I know you say you're hurting because you're single but it may go deeper than that. You should get help because the best relationships are when both people are complete and whole as a person.
And looks aren't always important. Good Luck. I hope this helps/
I think you'll have more luck finding a girlfriend once you feel good about yourself. Put all your effort into sorting out your classes. Once you start to do well you will become more confident in yourself and be a happier, more attractive person. Desperation, neediness and under achievement will not attract girls. We want a confident person who knows who they are, what they're aiming for and are are happy with or without a female on their arm. Find yourself first, be happy with who you are. Good luck X
You need to see a psychologist so you can figure out why it is that you find personal value through another human being? You should be happy with yourself girlfriend or no girlfriend. I know it must be hard with no friends, though, but see a psychologist. There is probably nothing wrong with you at all except your self-image.
Women can smell desperation.
Nobody wants to be with a needy person.
Take some time to gain confidence in yourself and loosen up.
Becoming suicidal just because you don't have a girlfriend is mighty silly at 19 years old, or any age.
You need to spend some time maturing before getting into a relationship..
Hi. I;m sorry but that sounds crazy.
Having a girlfriend wont solve all your problems, I think itll make them worse. There are lots of ups and downs in relationships and by commiting to noe, you are adding more problems to your other ones. My advice would be to get your school life in order and confidence up, than things will fall into place.. Good Luck
well it sound like to me that your happiness depends on if you have a girlfriend or not. you're 19 that's young you have plenty of time for women just focus on things you like to do and you'll meet someone. just just don't rely on another person to make you happy...............make yourself happy. good luck!
dude its nothing wrong being single. I would suggest forcus on passing and get your own life in gear first before you bring someone into your life. Then talk to girls at school heck try the internet. theres plenty of women and your only 19 come on! Take your time and enjoy your single life go out to the clubs. You will get your girl if you take control of your life first. peace.
Why is having a GF SO important to you?
You should have a full and happy life without a lady.
You are searching desperately for someone else to make you happy and that is not going to work.
You sound like you may need some counseling to get over this.
Good Luck to you.
You are still young. You have your whole life ahead of you to find someone. Finding people isnt always that great either cause sometimes they get in the way and end up lying, hurting, and taking advantage, but I know you will find someone. Theres someone out there for everybody.
Having a girlfriend something that will not fix your Depression , But talking to someone about it your Depression. You'er never alone if you know whom you are within yourself , and able to find friends whom care about you.
I think your depression is clouding your judgment. It's not a girlfriend you need, dear, it's counseling. See if your community college has free psychologists and go visit one. You need professional help, not the ramblings of people on here.
You are right people do need companionship but you have to love you first. A girlfrend can't fix your depression, you have to work on you first and that may involve more time with you. Learn to love who you are because if you loved yourself suicide would not be an option. find yourself.
You don't need a girlfriend. There are plenty of single people that are happy and not suicidal. You need to focus on school. You may also need to speak with a counselor to see why you are really depressed. Hope everything gets better.
I understand the feeling of being lonely and wanting a girl, but in all honesty..the problem lies in you. You need to be happy with yourself and your own life before you let anyone new in...
Maybe you are trying too hard. You should take some time off and relax. You say that girls are rejecting you, so what? Relax man, they don't know what they're missing.
Thats a little pathetic. You have some issues to deal with before you even think about getting yourself a girl, or before one considers dating you.
Girls wont date someone who is depressed unless they are also depressed. You are not going to get a girlfriend when you feel this way.
suffering from girlmania?
I am here!! You sound like a really nice guy I dont know why you dont have a girlfriend. Lucky me!!
try for bbw chick they are pretty cool and they love you to death
Aww :(
She's out their somewhere hunny.
You've just got to find her.
Listen don't get depressed over it, Concentrate on passing your classes.
If you have any guy mates why dont you go out to a club for the night and you may find a girl there. Just pluck up the courage and just say Hello, How are you. To a girl that you'd like to become friends with She won't bite :P
Your only 19. The girl of your dreams will come along soon. Can't you get a part time job or a saturday job? Maybe you'd meet a girl worker there...
Or you could just randomly meet a girl.
Don't stress about it you sound like a really nice guy (: If i met you i'd go out with you :P But sadly your to old for me. Lol.
I hope you find her soon Hun. Just please dont get upset over it ):
Good luck x
A girlfriend won't fix whatever you feel is missing in your life. I'm guessing that you've pinned all your fears and hopes and worries and stresses on this one thing and expect it to make your life worthwhile -- but what person would want to take on that kind of a burden, the responsibility of fixing you and shouldering all your problems? A relationship should be a partnership, where you share good times and bad, not where one person unloads all their expectations on the other. I suspect the women you eye sense this about you and don't want to become your caretaker.
I would strongly suggest getting into counselling -- colleges often have counsellors available -- and working on getting yourself a bit more in balance and happy with yourself first. You tend to stumble over love much more easily and successfully when you're not out searching desperately for it and pinning all your expectations on the other person.
First of all you don't NEED a girlfriend you want one, second of all a girlfriend isn't going to pay your college loans if you flunk out so you may want to re-prioritize a bit. You may want to talk to a college counselor about this desire to HAVE to have a girlfriend. Suicidal is a bit rash and you need some help, more then yahoo answers is going to give you, you need to be complete with yourself before you can get a girlfriend, by the sound of your state of mind, and irrational behavior that could very well be why you don't have a girlfriend and why if you get one you wont' keep her, women like strong men, work on it.
aww don't feel sad! I might be younger than you but I know exactly how you feel. I think it was in 2006 that I started to feel very sad because I didn't have a boyfriend and every girl around my age was talking about how they had a boyfriend and all, and I was really sad and hurt. But I focused on the other good things about my life. YES I still do want a boyfriend but I know that if I wait a little bit longer, the right one will come along. So just hang in there ok? You will have a girfriend just wait. do not kill yourself JUST WAIT
You need to have something to offer a girlfriend besides a drepressed and susidal personality! You need to get YOURSELF TOGETHER, BEFORE you try and get a girlfriend! It is because you feel you can't live alone and are drepressed that you don't have a girlfriend! Girls can pick up on you being so desparate to have a girlfriend and how you are feeling about yourself and your life! Untill you can learn to love you and love being with yourself, and have your life together and be confident, you won't have a girlfriend unless you are lucky enough to find one as depressed and confused as you and that you don't need! It's time to grow up now, being able to accept living alone is all a part of growing up, some have an easier time than others! A girl wants a confident man to go out with not a sniveling insecure little boy! Work on getting yourself together and your dating life should improve!
It is not impossible to live without a girlfriend/boyfriend. I did it for 20 years, and just to let you know, I am 20 years old. I have also been rejected plenty of times, and I have to admit, I know where you are coming from. All my friends have been in long term relationships, and my two closest friends are actually a couple and I used to do everything with them. But recently I have been hanging out with more people like me, people who are single. It helps me forget about wanting someone. That person is out there for you, and you will find them when the time is right. Right now, school is the most important thing in your life, and that is what you need to concentrate on.
Maybe if you stop being a little girl about everything then they will take a liking to you. Remember just because they say no doesn't mean you need to take a day out of your life to cry about it. Your a man, act like one.
My best friend askedme for advice on her married life help!?
So my best friend asked me some personal questions and im not sure how to best answer them for her.
She said that she isnt in love with her husband any more and is thinking of seeking divorce. She has children and the youngest is 4. Her 4 year old is very attached to his father, and it would most likely cause great stress.
She wanted to know what I thought, but honestly I dont think she should do it. I feel that her children have a really good father that loves them and provides for them. My friend has no job, and in my opnion not trying to work things out with her man.
She say that hes very distant with her, never says he lvoes her, doesnt celebrate their aniversary or every want to have sex with her. But she says that she doesnt belive hes cheating because hes been like this before they were married.
I'm over my head because i have different beleifs than her and dont think divorce should be an option when hes not physically hurting her.
What do you guys think?My best friend askedme for advice on her married life help!?
I agree, good advice here. Especially from Valmart. Stay out of it and offer no opinions. She is only looking for validation of her decision from you. Don't offer it, but let her know you are her friend and will be there for her as well as her husband if you are friends with him, too. A tough line to walk, but it can be done.My best friend askedme for advice on her married life help!?
It's not good for any marriage to end, especially when there's children involved. She should try counseling first, and do whatever she can to save the marriage. But if she's at the point that she feels she can't do anything else, then maybe the best solution is to separate, and live apart.
I would have to agree with you. I know that it would be hard to live in a marriage where there wasn't any love. I once heard and maybe it is advice that you can give your friend is your spend as much on working on your marriage through couselling or some kind of help as you did on getting married. So if you spent $5000 on getting married you should spend $5000 on help to get your marriage back on track and then if that doesn't work at least you know you have spent as much on your marriage as you did on getting married.
Honestly I don't believe she should stay in a marriage for the children. That is really fake. The atmosphere can be cover up only for so long.
I used to have the same views on divorce, but if you are unhappy with someone and if all things have been done to make it work and it still has no hope then enough is enough. A person can't control their love.
good answers here http://www.barbaradeangelis.com/advice.a鈥?/a>
Tell her to buy ';The commitment chronicles'; and ';For Women Only, what you need to know about the inner lives of men'; these books can be found at amazon.com. They are awesome and they will help her out in understanding her husband and how to change the relationship to the better even without telling him about it or even having him cooperate. She should give her marriage another chance, for the sake of the children. They are the ones who suffer the most, I know, my parents are divorced and it hurt a lot, and still does and I'm 31.
Also check out the new TLC program on Mondays at 10pm called: ONe week to save your marriage...
Explain to your friend that while you feel for her situation, you don't feel that you are qualified to give her advise on such a life altering decision. Friends should never ask or give this sort of advise because it always ends up hurting their relationship. If the couple get back together and you have advised they should part, then you are the bad guy. If you advise her to stay with him and she continues to be miserable, she blames you. You, the friend, just can't win. It's a difficult situation for all concerned and while you want to help your friend the best thing you can do for her is to be a sympathetic ear and shoulder for her to cry on and let her know that you will always be there for her. Then offer to help her to find some good counseling and just let her know that you care too much about your friendship to risk jeopardizing it by giving bad advise. If she is any kind of friend she will understand and appreciate your honesty.
relationships - marriage , family these are the most important part of any humans life. a lot of times there comes a situation that the driving force to keep them going is temporarily gone(human nature). we all wander unknowingly in this vast field called life. in this situation a person shall have faith in the other and keep going. i hope your friend married her husband as she could have faith in him.
proper communications is the biggest part. if u do not like something why dont u ask y is that happening - after all u are his significant other. why does nt she simply ask her husband the same things.
moreover , now she has kids. its not only him , now , she has the responsibility of her kids too and it is well known fact that kids do need both parents to help them learn life in the best way.
she needs to discuss these things with her husband as soon as possible. before things get worser and worser.
thinking of divorce is cowardice. its like running away from problem instead of dealing with it.
She said that she isnt in love with her husband any more and is thinking of seeking divorce. She has children and the youngest is 4. Her 4 year old is very attached to his father, and it would most likely cause great stress.
She wanted to know what I thought, but honestly I dont think she should do it. I feel that her children have a really good father that loves them and provides for them. My friend has no job, and in my opnion not trying to work things out with her man.
She say that hes very distant with her, never says he lvoes her, doesnt celebrate their aniversary or every want to have sex with her. But she says that she doesnt belive hes cheating because hes been like this before they were married.
I'm over my head because i have different beleifs than her and dont think divorce should be an option when hes not physically hurting her.
What do you guys think?My best friend askedme for advice on her married life help!?
I agree, good advice here. Especially from Valmart. Stay out of it and offer no opinions. She is only looking for validation of her decision from you. Don't offer it, but let her know you are her friend and will be there for her as well as her husband if you are friends with him, too. A tough line to walk, but it can be done.My best friend askedme for advice on her married life help!?
It's not good for any marriage to end, especially when there's children involved. She should try counseling first, and do whatever she can to save the marriage. But if she's at the point that she feels she can't do anything else, then maybe the best solution is to separate, and live apart.
I would have to agree with you. I know that it would be hard to live in a marriage where there wasn't any love. I once heard and maybe it is advice that you can give your friend is your spend as much on working on your marriage through couselling or some kind of help as you did on getting married. So if you spent $5000 on getting married you should spend $5000 on help to get your marriage back on track and then if that doesn't work at least you know you have spent as much on your marriage as you did on getting married.
Honestly I don't believe she should stay in a marriage for the children. That is really fake. The atmosphere can be cover up only for so long.
I used to have the same views on divorce, but if you are unhappy with someone and if all things have been done to make it work and it still has no hope then enough is enough. A person can't control their love.
good answers here http://www.barbaradeangelis.com/advice.a鈥?/a>
Tell her to buy ';The commitment chronicles'; and ';For Women Only, what you need to know about the inner lives of men'; these books can be found at amazon.com. They are awesome and they will help her out in understanding her husband and how to change the relationship to the better even without telling him about it or even having him cooperate. She should give her marriage another chance, for the sake of the children. They are the ones who suffer the most, I know, my parents are divorced and it hurt a lot, and still does and I'm 31.
Also check out the new TLC program on Mondays at 10pm called: ONe week to save your marriage...
Explain to your friend that while you feel for her situation, you don't feel that you are qualified to give her advise on such a life altering decision. Friends should never ask or give this sort of advise because it always ends up hurting their relationship. If the couple get back together and you have advised they should part, then you are the bad guy. If you advise her to stay with him and she continues to be miserable, she blames you. You, the friend, just can't win. It's a difficult situation for all concerned and while you want to help your friend the best thing you can do for her is to be a sympathetic ear and shoulder for her to cry on and let her know that you will always be there for her. Then offer to help her to find some good counseling and just let her know that you care too much about your friendship to risk jeopardizing it by giving bad advise. If she is any kind of friend she will understand and appreciate your honesty.
relationships - marriage , family these are the most important part of any humans life. a lot of times there comes a situation that the driving force to keep them going is temporarily gone(human nature). we all wander unknowingly in this vast field called life. in this situation a person shall have faith in the other and keep going. i hope your friend married her husband as she could have faith in him.
proper communications is the biggest part. if u do not like something why dont u ask y is that happening - after all u are his significant other. why does nt she simply ask her husband the same things.
moreover , now she has kids. its not only him , now , she has the responsibility of her kids too and it is well known fact that kids do need both parents to help them learn life in the best way.
she needs to discuss these things with her husband as soon as possible. before things get worser and worser.
thinking of divorce is cowardice. its like running away from problem instead of dealing with it.
Need advice regarding school and my life!?
Hello! I'm 25 yrs. old, and after high school graduation (2000) I started school at a Technical college. Seems as though my mind wasn't ready for college so I started working full-time for the company that I am still currently with (not to crazy about either). I have moved up as far as I could without my degree. I registered at the college for this summer (May 28, 2007) full-time. Put a 2 week notice in with the job since they won't work around my schedule. I've never made a change like this before and I'm scared to death.!! I'm taking one step back to eventually take two steps forward in the future. I have no idea what I want to do career wise, or anything in general. How do I generate a plan on what I want from myself in the next 2 yrs.? Someone who went through similar situation please chime in and give me some advice! Seems as though everyone else my age is moving on (buying homes, getting married, making more money, etc.) Thanks for any advice!!!Need advice regarding school and my life!?
When I was 24, I quit a dead-end job to go to a technical college, but I was very excited about computer programming. I can't imagine starting at a technical college with no career goals. If you have any intellectual curiosity, you could drift for a while in liberal arts or general studies--try out sociology, writing, business management, whatever, and see if anything appeals to you.
Now I'm burned out on computers and have no career goals left, so I'm sort of in the same boat as you. I'd suggest you go to the career placement office at your college and take the Strong Interest Inventory (Strong is someone's name, not an adjective). It will give you a lot of food for thought. There are many other career tests, but that's by far the best for me. The career placement office should also be able to help you with counseling.
As a long-time homeowner, I'd advise against buying a home unless you desperately want one. They are money pits, they chew up a lot of time, and unless you're lucky the financial return isn't that great. The propaganda machine for homes is very powerful, but look at what motivates the drumbeat for them: millions of homeowners who want to justify their decision, huge corporations with huge advertising budgets that promote buying and decorating houses, and the media (especially newspapers) that gets a lot of advertising revenue from the home industry.
My most important advice is not to compare yourself with your peers. Don't marry until you've found the one you know you want to spend the rest of your life with. Don't buy a house just because other people do. And don't compare your income or possessions with others, because unless you're Bill Gates you'll always feel bad. That doesn't mean you should be stupid about money, just be aware that America's state religion of materialism is a false religion.
Good luck,
HouyhnhnmNeed advice regarding school and my life!?
I'm 27 and have just enrolled in courses to go back to school to completely change that ';master plan'; I had when I got my bachelor's degree. I don't have to quit my job (yet) to do it, but I have moved on and have the husband and the house. It's just as terrifying for me as for you, because I have a lot to lose.
It IS scary! But don't generate a plan right now. Or at least, leave some wiggle room in that plan. Life has a way of changing your plans.
I am where you are at, but I am a little older. As long as you realize that you do need a plan, whatever than plan may be, it should work out. Since you know that the sacrifice you are making now is to benefit your future, dont do anything that may jeopardize that. Just because everyone around you seem to be progressing, doesnt mean you have to be at that pace as well. Some people have families with money that give them all the financial help and support, while others have to work three times as hard to achieve those same goals. Make sure you decide what you want in the end and dont compromise what makes you happy. Keep that eye on the prize!
Getting that Degree will open many doors to you. Instead of hitting a glass ceiling you'll have a chance to move up in a company not just be a number.
I think you are on the right track. I'm 28 and am going back to school this summer as well. I am not as fortunate to quit my job so I will be working full time (45 hr week) and going to school full time(5 classes). I think you made a great decision. I was like you, when I went to school @ 19, I was really not into it and ended up wasting money and time. it will be hard for you, I'm not saying it wont, but in the long run it will be for the better. As far as making a plan for the next two years, I am not one to do much planning. I believe in taking things one step at a time. If you think too much about the things you want to accomplish your going to overwhelm yourself and feel depressed because your plan is not going to schedule. Take it step by step, day by day and before you know it...you will be graduating and life will simply put itself in order. Good Luck!
Your still young. Stay the course and get that degree. You don't say how you are supporting yourself. Set a goal for a graduation, try to work in an industry that may include what your degree will be in and don't give up. You've already experienced what it's like to go as far as you can without a degree so that should be a strong incentive. Quitting or procastinating will only return you to where you were.
When I was 24, I quit a dead-end job to go to a technical college, but I was very excited about computer programming. I can't imagine starting at a technical college with no career goals. If you have any intellectual curiosity, you could drift for a while in liberal arts or general studies--try out sociology, writing, business management, whatever, and see if anything appeals to you.
Now I'm burned out on computers and have no career goals left, so I'm sort of in the same boat as you. I'd suggest you go to the career placement office at your college and take the Strong Interest Inventory (Strong is someone's name, not an adjective). It will give you a lot of food for thought. There are many other career tests, but that's by far the best for me. The career placement office should also be able to help you with counseling.
As a long-time homeowner, I'd advise against buying a home unless you desperately want one. They are money pits, they chew up a lot of time, and unless you're lucky the financial return isn't that great. The propaganda machine for homes is very powerful, but look at what motivates the drumbeat for them: millions of homeowners who want to justify their decision, huge corporations with huge advertising budgets that promote buying and decorating houses, and the media (especially newspapers) that gets a lot of advertising revenue from the home industry.
My most important advice is not to compare yourself with your peers. Don't marry until you've found the one you know you want to spend the rest of your life with. Don't buy a house just because other people do. And don't compare your income or possessions with others, because unless you're Bill Gates you'll always feel bad. That doesn't mean you should be stupid about money, just be aware that America's state religion of materialism is a false religion.
Good luck,
HouyhnhnmNeed advice regarding school and my life!?
I'm 27 and have just enrolled in courses to go back to school to completely change that ';master plan'; I had when I got my bachelor's degree. I don't have to quit my job (yet) to do it, but I have moved on and have the husband and the house. It's just as terrifying for me as for you, because I have a lot to lose.
It IS scary! But don't generate a plan right now. Or at least, leave some wiggle room in that plan. Life has a way of changing your plans.
I am where you are at, but I am a little older. As long as you realize that you do need a plan, whatever than plan may be, it should work out. Since you know that the sacrifice you are making now is to benefit your future, dont do anything that may jeopardize that. Just because everyone around you seem to be progressing, doesnt mean you have to be at that pace as well. Some people have families with money that give them all the financial help and support, while others have to work three times as hard to achieve those same goals. Make sure you decide what you want in the end and dont compromise what makes you happy. Keep that eye on the prize!
Getting that Degree will open many doors to you. Instead of hitting a glass ceiling you'll have a chance to move up in a company not just be a number.
I think you are on the right track. I'm 28 and am going back to school this summer as well. I am not as fortunate to quit my job so I will be working full time (45 hr week) and going to school full time(5 classes). I think you made a great decision. I was like you, when I went to school @ 19, I was really not into it and ended up wasting money and time. it will be hard for you, I'm not saying it wont, but in the long run it will be for the better. As far as making a plan for the next two years, I am not one to do much planning. I believe in taking things one step at a time. If you think too much about the things you want to accomplish your going to overwhelm yourself and feel depressed because your plan is not going to schedule. Take it step by step, day by day and before you know it...you will be graduating and life will simply put itself in order. Good Luck!
Your still young. Stay the course and get that degree. You don't say how you are supporting yourself. Set a goal for a graduation, try to work in an industry that may include what your degree will be in and don't give up. You've already experienced what it's like to go as far as you can without a degree so that should be a strong incentive. Quitting or procastinating will only return you to where you were.
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